Friday, June 17, 2011

Switched at Birth

So there's a new tv show on ABCFamily called Switched at Birth. I missed the first episode and just saw the second episode and I was HOOKED 5 minutes into the show! It's about two girls who were switched at birth and found each other (and their biological families) as teenagers. One of the girls, Daphne, is Deaf!

I'm so happy because I've been waiting for a show like this for the longest time!!!!! I've wanted a show that (almost) centers around a deaf girl. A show that brings awareness about the Deaf . A show where there's a lot of signing and they have to put subtitles on the screen so hearing people know what's being said, now my friends can put themselves in my shoes because I have to watch regular shows with captions to understand what is being said lol.

I can relate to Daphne in SOOOO many ways (from episode 2 alone since I missed the first one)!!!! I'm Deaf because of getting meningitis as a young child and was raised by a single mother (except I  had a brother). I feel the same way in group settings when everybody is talking and I went to a Deaf school. I've had people ask me about Deaf people driving and how it's safe for us to drive. I've had people ask me if I lipread stranger's conversations and yes, I've had a lot of misunderstood moments like "knees on cheese" instead of "Neon Trees" lol. At the end of the episode, there was a scene where Daphne was walking down the street with a hearing guy named Liam and his friends showed up and were being jerks.... I've been there before too and have done what she did lol.

I am absolutely in love with this show and can't wait for the next episode. I really hope that they keep this show going past one season. That is my biggest fear about getting so into this show is that they will cancel it after the season is over. It happened to me recently. I got hooked on the shows No Ordinary Family and Off the Map. They were just recently canceled and I was so disappointed. So I'm praying that it doesn't happen with Switched at Birth. I think (hope) that a lot of people will be outraged if it was.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Mourning and Celebrating

Yesterday was both a good day and bad day for me. For those of you who don't know me very well; in October 2010 I found out that I was pregnant on a Friday and then not even a week later on Wednesday, it was discovered that the baby was tubal. I was given a shot to dissolve the pregnancy and a week later had to have laparoscopic surgery to remove the baby (tube ended up being removed too because it was damaged beyond repair) because the shot hadn't worked.

I decided that the baby deserved a name so after doing research online, I chose Devi. At the time I was led to believe that it was unisex and Hindi for "Resides in Heaven." A month later, I decided I wanted a memorial tattoo for Devi and after a month of thinking about it, I decided on the phrase "Unborn baby in the hands of Heaven." I decided to have it translated into Hindi so I contacted a translator where I learned that Devi actually means "Goddess" or "Female Angel" which is fitting because I always wanted a girl.

I gave my tattoo artist, Bill, the script and told him that I wanted a red rose and a yucca flower and I wanted it all to look like one design instead of 3 separate pieces. The red rose was to symbolize the single red rose that is typically laid on top of the coffin at the funeral and the yucca (being the New Mexico state flower) symbolizes where it all happened and where Devi's "grave" is.

I had originally decided that I wanted the tattoo on my lower left stomach (it was my left tube) but realized that with my future pregnancies it could very likely be stretched out so it went on my left hip where it would be relatively safe. I really love the design Bill did. I especially love how he placed the leaves to make the script look like the stem for the flowers. It really is one tattoo instead of 3 separate pieces. As for the "red" rose, he did such an amazing job with the shading that the tattoo really didn't need coloring.

Yesterday would have been Devi's estimated due date if things had gone differently and I hadn't lost her. Yesterday, I got my tattoo. The hardest part of all of this has been the fact that I didn't get to have a funeral or lay my baby to rest in peace. I'm in a much better place now because not only is it a memorial tattoo but it was a way to let most of the emotional pain escape through physical pain. Yesterday I celebrated what could have been and mourned what will not be. In a way, I gave my baby her funeral. Rest in Peace Devi. Mommy loves you.

 (Tattoo 10 minutes after completion)

(The following pics were taken today after some of the swelling had gone down and I've included closeups to show the detail.)

I will post new pics once it's completely healed.